I give up! After years of teetering between guilt and deprivation, I’d finally decided never to diet again. All the experts in weight control insist that the only way to get and stay thin is to eat in moderation. Starving leads to binging when the dieter reaches his or her breaking point. And so I decided never to diet again. In theory, all I had to do was eat whatever I wanted, but in moderation. I shunned fat burning foods, low-fat foods and all the bland, boring low calorie meals that I’d convinced myself were tasty because I so desperately wanted to be thin. The day after an appointment with my doctor where I was, much to my dismay, weighed…no cheating on his scale…I began testing this concept. After two weeks, my home scale told me that I’d lost three pounds, not remarkable, but I’d been eating like a “normal” person, so I was satisfied, perfectly willing to keep up this way of eating for months to be able to reach my ideal weight. Then, just today, I needed to go back to see my doctor. Once again I was weighed. According to his scale, I’d gained half a pound. I don’t get it. I did everything that I was supposed to do; I even went to bed hungry some nights. I didn’t overdo any rich foods…only half a baked potato without butter or sour cream, half a cup of rice, very little pasta (whole wheat). I kept my diet healthy with a lot of fresh vegetables and fruit, oatmeal for breakfast. I guess it’s back to the drawing board. I guess I’ll have to drag out my diet books; stock up on fat burning foods, cook up a pot of cabbage soup and begin again…or else, just give up and accept the fact that I just may have to remain overweight for the rest of my life.