Most people assume that attending marriage counseling means that your relationship is in trouble. In this case, premarital counseling and pre marriage advice is used to clear the air and communicate your ideas of marriage before they become problems. A family therapist or clergy is often the councilor of choice. Marriage is a continual evolution as you grow and change as a couple. Learning skills to help you face those changes in stride and as a couple is the goal of your counselor. By starting your marriage on solid ground, you improve the likely hood that you can weather the storms and have a life long loving and committed relationship.
Pre marriage counseling is a wise choice because being happy and in love often blinds us to the reality that relationships take more than “I love you” to make them last. Before making the trip down the aisle, ask yourself and your partner, a few questions about, religion, sex, finances, trust, respect, careers, children, common interests, goals, communication and who is going to clean the toilet. Not as easy as it first sounded, is it? Do you both have the exact same ideas? That is where your premarital counselor comes to help.
Differences of opinion on these issues do not necessarily mean that the relationship is finished. Being able to communicate and compromise is a large part of marriage. Teaching you those skills to you is how your counselor helps to work with you and provide that solid ground, rather than hoping it all works out because you love each other.
Relationship counseling will help you understand that a long-term relationship is not about physical attraction or beauty, and it cannot be restored with beauty techniques like deciding to dye eyelashes darker or plastic surgery. Healthy marriages are based on mutual understanding, trust, and unshakable love for one another.
In the long road of life, you will reap the rewards of open communication with your spouse. When the hard times come, and they will, you will be better prepared to lock hands and stand together as a unit rather than two leaves blowing in the wind.
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